33 Days of Truth: Day 23


Another quick post. I feel like I’m kind of cheating when I do this, but with so much going on in preparation from my big move, it can’t really be helped. Soon I’ll have more time to write. Meanwhile I’ll just drop a pin along the journey of my 33 Days of Truth personal growth challenge.

What truth is there to talk about today?

The truth of how blessed I am. How blessed I’ve been.

Tonight is my last night on the west side of Maui, where I’ve been living for a year and half, working and living with a family, becoming part of the fold as the nanny to two kids. We all went out to dinner together tonight (thai food, omg heaven), and then went to a family friend’s Catholic communion.

Incidentally, I love being inside churches. The vibe is so light and sacred. It’s beautiful. But I do feel it gets rather cluttered up by all the religious stuff, the ingrained traditions and rote processes of standing up, sitting down, repeating phrases and going through the motions of devotion.

I realize it’s deeply meaningful for some people, a powerful part of their experience of feeling safe and loved. I get that. I don’t personally need that; and maybe I’m as relieved that I don’t need it as others are comforted that they do. To each their own.

Anyway. During the ceremony, I particularly enjoyed whenever we were instructed to sit down. Or to close our eyes in prayer (ah, sleepy time!). I was not the only one yawning in there, I noticed.

The Father walked down the aisle and swished holy water at everybody. A few droplets landed on my skin. I grinned to myself at the weird things we humans think and do.

When the eating Christ’s flesh part came, I learned that you need to cross your arms over your chest if you have not been through communion before, and the Father will bless you instead of feeding you the Jesus wafer.

I didn’t get to eat the wafer. (Jokes on them though, I have had it before! In a different church of another faith… I’m not sure which, there are so many…)

I was blessed in the church tonight, but what really means something to me is how blessed I am in my life. I felt this as I spent some final time with my nanny family this evening. My Maui ‘ohana. They are some of the most easy going, flexible, generous, kind, caring and good hearted human beings you could meet.

They were the perfect people and staying with them the perfect situation for what I needed, at the perfect time. We connected through a Craigslist ad that I posted while looking for a work-trade living situation, and I ended up on their beautiful property, and becoming one of the family.

And it wasn’t just them I was blessed with, but many others, including my employers, coworkers, friends, acquaintances; folks who showed me true aloha here on the island.

I’m feeling the love and the good fortune that life has shown me, through these people I’ve met here, as I say goodbye to everyone and prepare to return to the mainland.

Island life has a special halo around it right now; in the light of leaving everything has taken on a radiant hue of goodness and forgiveness. All is well. The burdens of my former discontent are shed because I am moving forward, which is exactly what the unrest and unhappiness came to tell me to do.

It’s funny how even the greatest gifts can become curses to us when we reach a point of needing to grow beyond them. It’s an important thing to recognize. It doesn’t make them any less valuable in our lives. In fact it makes them more so.

When we let go of the things that hold us back, we are set free.

Here on island, despite its many virtues, I have struggled with feeling stuck, stale, lost, desperate for change. I came out on the other side of my time here more purely me, stronger and more sure about what I want, because of the experiences I have had, and because of those who opened their arms and invited me in. In that embrace, I’ve found my way out of what held me back.

Although island life has not been all rainbows and sunshine, as I talked about in my previous post, Even in Paradise, it has most certainly been blessed.

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